It seems to be one the laws of nature that you cannot commit a single action without expecting repercussion of at least equal force...I mean...I say it SEEMS to be because we have all seen examples where the balance of power is greatly favored on one side or the other.
It seems these days that I cannot take a step into the quicksand without falling through the sky.
But...then again, doesn't that all just seem like repeating? I mean..doesn't it all kind of seem misleading?
And yes, this is the part where I break free from my own tethers...and I see now that I have placed restrictions upon even this writing...as if...what did I want to talk about? My own Bi-polar neurosis as if anyone wants to hear about the afflictions of the human vessel I inhabit?
No...we want to hear of Shit Baby and we want to hear of Lionel and we want to hear of great news...that great things are coming. We want to be happy and joyous and beyond jubilation and just so god damn JUICY right? Because I needed another word that starts with J...right?
I could have spelled it Jay
But we don't talk about that, do we?
Hahahaha....no, not, no, know, now, knooooooooooo, no we don't.
Not now, not ever.
Maybe later.
I will tell you one thing right now, and I will be as honest as I can with you...random fucking strangers that I have no reason to trust because you all turn on me eventually because you are truly cancer....aren't you?
Ha.
Yeah...
Well, here's what I will tell you.
I will never promise you anything.
I will never ask you to expect anything of me
I will never expect you to think I am delivering anything to you.
However, I have inside of me - an unstoppable force of nature - a gift.
I am not of Earth.
I don't even fucking like this planet.
But I'm here to...burn as brightly as I can.
Because it is dark here.
Hahahaha...now, let's try some word Jazz, shall we?
p993
Hollow and drawn out and slithering through the spines of old books and dead leaf pages
they smelled like smoke
It reminded me of your old house that had burned down, but you rebuilt it, and it burned down again.
It reminded me of your home that keeps burning, those dead leafs.
You are just a reminder of those dead leafs.
And a broken home built on ramshackle and crutches and the invisible man wrapped in tampons.
Sometimes I feel like life is a jungle and I am just mowing you down.
All of you, as if a rainforest had disolved into coffee...or tea...or maybe one lump or two...and maybe you had yourself in a pie...like cream...and it rises and it falls and it stirs down into a god damn pit...and you think it is despair but you have no idea what despair is yet...not yet...NOT YET...because you will...and if you hold on to me, I will take you to the bottom...I can drag you down...I can pull you down...I am the fucking devil and I have come to do the devils work and I will see your end
because I have seen my own
six years from now.
And some change.
I will die.